Programming!!! DO YOU SPEAK IT?!

As a developer I am acutely aware of the struggles between development and management. Sometimes, even in Agile environments, we (developers) just want management to go away and let us build good products.

There are many manifestos out there, we here at Agile Scout even have our own [here].

So what about Samuel L. Jackson’s Programming Manifesto? If you’re ¬†fan of his work, you may absolutely love Zed A. Shaw‘s depiction of what Jules Winnfield in Pulp Fiction would say (language changed below because we are a family friendly site):

We are a community of $%*#@&* programmers who have been humiliated by software development methodologies for years.

We are tired of XP, Scrum, Kanban, Waterfall, Software Craftsmanship (aka XP-Lite) and anything else getting in the way of…Programming, $%*#@&*.

We are tired of being told we’re autistic idiots who need to be manipulated to work in a Forced Pair Programming chain gang without any time to be creative because none of the 10 managers on the project can do…Programming, $%*#@&*.

We must destroy these methodologies that get in the way of…Programming, $%*#@&*.

We think the sh*t on the left, is really just the con in the middle, and that we really need to just do the thing on the right…Programming, $%*#@&*.

This literally made me LOL in my seat.

I hope this makes you LOL as well.

[HT: Programming $%*#@&*]

5 Responses to “Programming!!! DO YOU SPEAK IT?!”

  1. Derek Huether
    April 8, 2011 at 12:26 pm #

    I read something like this on (Y Combinator) Hacker News a week or so ago. Reading it had my laughing and clapping like a cymbal monkey.

    • peter
      April 8, 2011 at 9:30 pm #

      I know right? Samuel Jackson somehow rules the internet. Just like #sheen

  2. Chris R. Chapman
    September 9, 2011 at 1:15 pm #

    So, Zed wants us to embrace ad-hoc? That’s a real LOLer, alright… ;-)

    • peter
      September 9, 2011 at 1:29 pm #

      HA! Love it.

  3. Marcelo R. Lopez, Jr.
    January 27, 2012 at 4:11 pm #

    Peter……One word. Brilliant !!

    Ok…four words.

    Manager: What ?

    Programmer: Say what again!!

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